Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) is a therapy model that focuses on understanding the negative interaction style that a couple gets stuck in and how they perpetuate it. As the couple begins to understand their negative cycle better, they are better equipped to stop the cycle and connect in more positive ways. In EFT, the negative cycle is the problem, not the partner. This model is not pathologizing.
We are mammals, we need each other. Those deep relational bonds can provide a safe secure environment where we can be ourselves and love unconditionally, because we understand that we are loved by the person that means the most to us. Relational distress can result in primal panic where coping strategies and attempts to connect can easily be misunderstood and we can totally miss our partner’s cues for connection.
For more information on EFT check the ICEEFT website: